Keeper For None

I knew watching My Sister's Keeper would do me in. =D

I believe that when people cry whilst watching a movie it's because sometimes, just sometimes, whatever they were watching was a glimpse into their lives. A small reel of life to identify with.

Watching the My Sister's Keeper's main character's siblings made me feel how they felt. Alone. I identified with that. That being in a family where no one sees, hears, understands, or bothers about you. But before you go, "there he goes again" and roll your eyes, I hope you know that all of that is something that doesn't bother me much now. I'm just saying that's what I identified with whilst watching the movie.

All I have to say is, even if you do feel alone (anywhere or with anyone), stand strong through it. The loneliness, the constant silence, the feeling of not being heard will be deafening.

But HEY! I made it.

You just got to know that you're never really alone despite the fact that you may not name someone who can help you through it. There will always be someone out there ready to see you for who you are, to hear you for what you have to say, to understand what you're all about, to bother, to care, to touch, to feel, to anything about you.

You just have to believe.

My family still does these things that most of the time irritates me but I've come to ignore it. They do what they want and I'll do what I want. Not bothering has actually relieved most of the tension between my parents and I.

I still feel like I'm a keeper for my family and I probably am, but I choose to believe that despite it, I'm going to walk freely, unshackled.

Honestly, I don't like being made to feel alone. It took me ages to ignore the fact that my parents did it and still do it all the time. So, when I am made to feel that way again, I cut whatever contributed to it like a gangrened arm.

I felt it before, I don't need reminders.

Just know that they're always better things waiting ahead and stuff like this doesn't hold anyone down. It shouldn't. You shouldn't let it.

-conRad-